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I give my woman half my money at the general store I said, \"Now buy a little groceries, and don't spend no more.\" But she gave ten dollars for a ten cent hat And bought some store bought cat food for a mean eyed cat.
When I give her ten more dollars for a one way ticket She was mad as could be Then I bet ten more that if she ever left She'd come a-crawlin' back to me When I woke up this mornin' and I turned my head There wasn't a cotton pickin' thing on her side of the bed I found a little note where her head belonged It said, \"Dear John, honey, baby, I'm long gone.\"
When I heard a whistle blowin', and the big wheels a-turnin' I was scared as I could be I pt on my overalls and I headed to town Gonna bring her back with me.
I asked the man down at the station if he'd seen her there I told him all about her pretty eyes and long, blonde hair He spit his tobacco, said, \"I'll be dad blamed, I believe I did see her leavin' on the east bound train.\"
I bought a round trip ticket on the east bound train I was broke as I could be But when I come back, gotta buy another ticket Gotta bring her back with me.
Well' I got off the train somewhere in Arkansas And I worked up the guts to call my Mother-In-Law She said, \"I'll tell you where she is, if you act right.\" \"She's workin' four to twelve at Trucker's World tonight.\"
When I walked in she saw me, and she took off her apron And she grabbed her goin' home hat She bought a ticket with her tips And now we've curled up on the sofa, me and her, and that mean eyed cat.